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Bitter, Childless Woman Writes Dear Abby 26 Aug 2013 | 07:09 pm
In Dear Abby today, a woman wrote in to complain that mothers insensitively brag about their kids while she has to listen. To this lady: too freakin’ bad. You don’t get to demand people be sensitive a...
Stop Bitching About Fake Fast Food Meat 22 Aug 2013 | 03:50 am
Why do people complain that Taco Bell, Burger King, and the other fast food places don’t use real meat in their products? Who cares? These same self-righteous protestors are also against pesticides on...
‘Yo Mama’s So Ugly’ Insults Now Backed By Science 22 Aug 2013 | 03:43 am
“Yo mama’s so ugly” jokes have always struck me as odd. After all, why do I care if you think my mama is ugly? Our relationship is strictly platonic (ew). And hell, I’d rather that my friends think th...
Thoughts On ‘I Love My Students With Autism’ Bumper Stickers 21 Aug 2013 | 01:37 am
I saw the “I Love My Students With Autism” bumper sticker today. Why add the “with autism” part? What purpose does that serve? Are you using your autism to love your students? That seems inaccurate. D...
Two Dudes On Subway Sitting Across From Each Other to Reinforce Heterosexuality 16 Aug 2013 | 10:52 pm
Recently, I saw two men who were obviously good friends get on the subway car I was riding. They proceed to sit across the aisle from each other, and proceeded to continue their conversation by yellin...
Facebook is Still Using You To Sell Crap You Don’t Remember Liking 15 Aug 2013 | 10:23 pm
A friendly PSA here to remind you that Facebook is still using you as a spokesmodel for brands that you don’t remember liking. Lately, it’s gotten bad. I’ve seen the same Facebook friends with the sam...
Media Rant: FiveThirtyEight And the New Era of Sports Sites Continued 14 Aug 2013 | 09:13 pm
Last time, I ranted about the terrifying possibilities of the budding “let’s give our most popular sports writer his own show” trend. Because it’s not hard to imagine an apocalyptic scenario where ESP...
Definitive Answers for the Inquisitive Child 13 Aug 2013 | 10:06 pm
Yes, Benji, for the last time, God is real. Yes, He is everywhere. Yes, even right next to you at the breakfast table right now while you’re eating your Cheerios. No, God is not in your bowl of Cheeri...
Media Rant: If Rick Reilly Gets His Own Site, I’m Going to Claw My Eyes Out 10 Aug 2013 | 02:41 am
Last year, ESPN started the wave of superstar-writer spinoff sites with Bill Simmons’ Grantland, which has legitimately turned into one of the best long-form sports and entertainment sites on earth. I...
Tech Rant: AOL and Yahoo! Are the Most Depressing Kids In Silicon Valley High 9 Aug 2013 | 02:05 am
In upper-middle class suburban high schools, there’s always those few rich kids who try to buy their way into being cool but don’t quite pull it off. Teenagers have a great spidey sense for try-hards,...
